Weekend

It's noticeably colder isn't it? There were a few snow-like -not- quite- flakes falling in front of the headlights as I drove home yesterday but it didn't amount to anything yet. We've gone up a degree on the old heating though!!! Wow, We've hit 18.5C now!!! There is only heating on in the rooms that we are using, and the cats definitely come off the best! Extra pullies on, and warm mugs of coffee or tea....not resorted to the blanket over me on the settee though...still time for that. Prefer a Cuddle though!

I am enjoying C. It's difficult thinking about moving onto D.

I want to add Connection to my list of lovely C's because I have started reading my "Daring Greatly" book by Brene Brown (wonderful) and in the first chapter she talks about how we are all connected.
(cue: 'Circle of life' song by Elton John). How essential that is too. I need to read more over the weekend, but since I have my own personal C in Catalyst, then it is promising reading! I do love her work, and her research is profound in the arena of Shame and Vulnerability. Her Ted Talks are viewed millions of times over on Youtube, and I just 'connect' with her on these at a deep level.

I read another book yesterday. No sense not admitting I am rather a speed reader than a diligent,  every word sort of reader, but I can skim through a book at the rate of knots when I want to! It was entitled "I am a highly sensitive person". So I am. Taking the test at the start was a doddle because I already knew the outcome, but it was the affirmation of some of my traits that I found interesting. Like why I wake up early and am most definitely at my best in the morning and my worst in the evenings. Like why I love to just think about thinking! My absolute connection (sticking with the theme here) with music and words and all art forms, and how moved I can be when everyone else is just breathing normally and not noticing the sobbing mass in the corner!
I have never really viewed my temperament as a problem, but it transpires that society in general does. Ok, I know my friends have to cope with my ultra-sensitivity and emotional high-wire act at times, but it also brings with it a deeply intuitive nature that has served me, and them, well over the years.

My best friend and I were talking about it yesterday. I said ' do you realise I am highly sensitive'? 'Of course', he replied; 'it's just you'. Acceptance is all that is required in the end. And understanding. And patience. And a lot of handkerchiefs!!

During the early hours of this morning when I was lying in bed wide awake, thinking as usual, I came to realise that there has been a shift in how I feel when I am in the team office since a couple of colleagues recently left. I feel lighter, and happier, and not overwhelmed with the sense of unhappiness and negativity that was there before Christmas. It's gone, been lifted from my shoulders, and I know I am responding in a healthier and freer way than I did before. It was as if their unhappiness was seeping into my body and searching for somewhere to rest or hide, or just be. I am so sensitive to atmospheres, and I just simply know when something is going on, or not right, or even wonderful. My connection to their emotions was impacting on my own, and whereas I have empathy and understanding for them, I am at the same time relieved it has passed.

I think I will choose Compassionate for today's C. Though I feel a D hovering above me, the C will do.

"That'll do, pig; that'll do". (bit of a film quoter I guess, too!)
Sue xx